On this page you will find information about:
- Employment support for partners of service personnel.
- Guidance on further education and training opportunities.
- Ways to meet new people and become part of a community.
This guide covers support relevant to partners, whether they are seeking it for just themselves or for their wider family unit.
Partners are significant members of the Armed Forces community; while some partners are civilians, some are veterans while their partner is still serving, and some couples are made up of two people serving at the same time.
Additionally, as the Armed Forces modernises, it is shifting to acknowledge Long-term established relationships and not just those who are married, in a civil partnership or have children.
The RBL can provide a wide range of support to people in the Armed Forces community. If this guide doesn't cover the topics that you're looking for, there is more information available about the support available.
Read more about how the RBL can help the Armed Forces community on our Knowledge Base website.
Support as an individual
Many organisations provide support for partners as an individual.
Employment support
Many partners are affected by moving for the career of the service person in their life. Amongst many things, it can impact the course of their employment and their access to pursuing their personal professional development.
However, there are many opportunities for partners to receive support in finding new work, develop their professional skills and meet others going through a similar experience.
The sort of support you might be able to receive includes:
- mentoring
- workshops and masterclasses
- education and qualification opportunities
- support crafting a CV, applying for jobs and preparing for interviews.
While some of the guidance is tailored specifically to married partners and family members, some resources might still be relevant to you regardless.
Find out more about returning to work after a gap in your employment, here on the RBL website.
Mental wellbeing support
With frequent moves and separation from your friends, family and support system, elements of being a military partner can affect your mental wellbeing. With help from others, you can work on rebuilding your mental wellbeing. There are many organisations, both civilian and Armed Forces specialised, that can help you find the tools you need to deal with whatever you face so you can feel at your best.
Support from The Ripple Pond
The Ripple Pond is a charity that supports adult family members of people who are physically or psychologically affected by their time in the Armed Forces. They believe in chosen family, and will support anyone over the age of 18 including partners, siblings, parents, friends and carers.
The Ripple Pond supports people through:
- Specialist one to one sessions
- Peer support groups, including 14 different regional chats
- Talks and events
- Employment Support, and
- Signposting.
Learn more about The Ripple Pond on their website, including how they can help.
Registering for a GP or Dentist
While currently serving personnel receive medical and dentistry treatment from the military during their time in service, their partners and family members have to arrange their own civilian treatments. If you move along with your currently serving partner's placements, you might have to register with a new GP and dentist in your new hometown.
Depending on how far you have to move from placement to placement, some families choose to keep their dentist consistent despite having changed location.
Read our guidance on how to register with a GP or dentist here on the RBL website.
Connecting with others when you feel socially isolated
Social isolation can be a big part of the lives of those in the Armed Forces Community, including for the partners of serving or ex-service personnel. The routines and commitments can leave you feeling lonely and isolated and the frequent relocations, moving away from family and friends, can add to this.
Finding opportunities in your local area based on the things you value, such as a specific exercise activity, crafting technique or passion, can be a great way to find people to connect with. This may help you to continue to thrive outside of your identity as a military partner. Even when it's difficult, it's important to make space and time to take part regularly in these opportunities as you might not feel a connection or benefit right away, but these connections might build and develop over time instead.
Many partners express difficulty in connecting with others outside of the community when it comes to finding friends who understand the lifestyle or specific things they face in relationships. They say that it is helpful to find connections with other people in the community who have a shared understanding of their experiences. If you are feeling isolated or know someone who you think could be feeling this way, there are many opportunities to connect with people in Armed Forces and civilian communities, including many options facilitated by RBL.
Explore our information on how you can combat social isolation with the RBL, here on our website.
Support for partners who identify as LGBTQIA+
While it has been over two decades since the ban was lifted on LGBTQIA+ people serving, many are still feeling its effects. Whether you are seeking support surrounding past or current experiences, or are seeking a sense of community, there is support available.
Learn more about support available to LGBTQIA+ people in the Armed Forces, here on the RBL website.
Cheaper train travel with HM Armed Forces railcards for spouses
Many people in relationships in the Armed Forces end up spending time and money on travelling, whether this is to spend time with their partner or whether it is to visit family or friends after relocating.
The Railcard costs £21 per year and is deducted from the service person's pay. It can help you save up to a third on train journeys across England, Scotland, and Wales, with some minimum fares and restrictions.
For those in the Armed Forces community who are living with a disability, you may also be eligible for a Disabled Person's rail card.
Experiencing Domestic Abuse
In an emergency always call 999 in the UK.
Call 112 in the EU or check locally for other overseas countries.
Domestic abuse can be experienced in many different forms, whether physical, emotional, economic abuse or coercive control to name just a few.
The Royal British Legion (RBL) is here for people in the Armed Forces community impacted by domestic abuse. We might be able to support you by:
- advocating for your rights and needs
- providing initial guidance and financial support to help you move to a safer location
- providing information, practical support and guidance on support from specialist Domestic Abuse agencies
- making a referral to your local specialist services
We are unable to support by providing formal safety planning advice or legal advice.
Get in touch
The RBL offer support to those who are serving, ex-service and their dependents, after just one day of service and continually through life.
To find out more about the support the RBL could offer you, contact us via:
Telephone: 0808 802 8080
Telephone overseas: +44 (0)20 3376 8080
Calls are free from UK landlines and main mobile networks
Email: [email protected]
Our team is available from 8am to 8pm, seven days a week.
Support from other organisations
Alternatively, there are many other organisations that are equipped to provide you with domestic abuse support, unspecialised to the Armed Forces community.
Get in touch
Visit the National Domestic Abuse Helpline website to chat online or:
Telephone: 0808 2000 247
The service is available for free, in confidence, 24 hours a day from a team of highly trained female advisers.
Fill in a contact form to request a call back from the Helpline team.
The service is available 10am to 6pm, Monday to Friday.
Visit the Respect - Men's Advice line website to chat online or:
Telephone: 0808 8010327
The service is available 10am to 5pm, Monday to Friday. Free from landlines and mobile phones within the UK. Your call will not appear on itemised bills. You can also call free from BT pay phones.
Email: [email protected]
The service is available 9am to 5pm, Monday to Friday.
Support for the family unit
Some families in the Armed Forces Community, whether still serving or having already left, might choose to have children. Many organisations, including RBL, will help to support children as dependents and will also support the partner of the service person, regardless of whether they are married, in a civil partnership, or separated.
Furthermore, while many Armed Forces families do not have children, they are still family units and therefore can be entitled to support such as housing in Service Family Accommodation.
As a partner in the Armed Forces community, you may manage decisions for your family unit. The information below covers topics to support you when making decisions for your loved ones.
Housing guidance and support
All regular service personnel are eligible for subsidised Armed Forces Housing through the MOD, whether that is Single Living Accommodation (SLA) or Service Family Accommodation (SFA). If you are not eligible for SFA, if there are other factors that make it impractical, or if you choose not to live in Armed Forces housing, you can look at private renting or buying a home. Under the Future Accommodation Model (FAM) the MOD aims to give more Service personnel greater choice and flexibility, including the option to live in rented properties, or buy a home with funding from the MOD.
Find more information on housing options for serving personnel on the RBL Knowledge Base website.
Housing eligibility changes at the end of a relationship
The end of a relationship is a challenging time which can be exacerbated by the changes it brings about. If you have been living in SFA, the ending of the relationship will affect your entitlement and therefore you will need to look for alternative living arrangements.
Financial guidance for those with children
Having children can cost a lot and in turn have a great impact on your finances. Support and guidance is available to help you manage the extra costs and navigate the world of having children. This includes guidance about maternity, paternity and adoption leave.
Information on accessing healthcare for service families
Armed Forces families face unique concerns when it comes to accessing healthcare. For example, with each move, you will need to reregister for a local GP for the civilian members of your family. While this can be overwhelming, there is guidance to help you manage the journey of accessing healthcare for you and your family.
Read more about support about accessing healthcare for Armed Forces families on the NHS website.
HIVE services to support the Armed Forces community
HIVEs are information services provided by the Army, Royal Navy and RAF to support the serving community including reservists and family members.
HIVEs can provide guidance and support to the community on a variety of topics including:
- health and wellbeing
- relocation
- deployment
- employment
- education
- training and more.
You can enquire about support by visiting your local HIVE or by contacting them online.
Get in touch
Royal Navy HIVEs
Visit the Royal Navy website to find your local HIVE, or contact Royal Navy HIVEs via:
Army HIVEs
Visit the Army website to find your local HIVE, or contact Army HIVEs via:
RAF HIVEs
Visit the RAF website to find your local HIVE, or contact RAF HIVEs via:
